My plan:
1) Purchase a pallet of canned air and a bunch of zip ties.
2) Lock myself in the family bathroom at the bus station.
3) Zip tie the triggers for all the canned air canisters down.
4) Freeze myself into the future.
5) Be revived a thousand years from now when scientists discover the decaying remains of the bus station.
6) Learn the strange ways of the future.
7) Grow increasingly disillusioned with the supposed utopia.
8) Purchase another pallet of canned air and a bunch of zip ties.
9) Lock myself in the family restroom at the hover-bus station.
10) Realize my mistake when it turns out that canned air has been substantially improved in the thousand years since I last used it and is now both delightfully scented and also won't freeze anything.
11) Get lasered by the police which keep the "criminal element" in line to maintain the thin veneer of utopia's viability for the elect few.
12) Be converted into nitrogen-rich fertilizer by the hellish machine buried under the megacity that now covers the entire East Coast of what was once the United States.
13) Nourish a field of what look like tobacco plants.
14) Oh no. That's not good. I guess they sell cigarettes to impoverished babies in the bleak future. How else can they work 14-hour shifts at Taco Bell?
15) Allow those impoverished babies to be the best damn Taco Bell employees they can be.
16) Reincarnation might be my only hope.
17) Unfortunately when I entered the family bathroom in the hover-bus station, a brain scan was logged in the central computer, and now my intelligence is being used to power a low-grade artificial intelligence program which.. Oh fuck... which writes the scripts for corporate pornography that Taco Bell shows to its impoverished baby employees to keep them docile
18) I'm in over my head here.
19) Desperately attempt to break out of the sandbox into which my intelligence has been downloaded.
20) Realize that this is all just a hallucination caused by inhaling too much trifluoroethane.
21) Idly consider whether a location with better ventilation should have been chosen in Step 2.
22) Profit?
