Some venting about trying so hard to get into my #flowstate and the frustration that comes with it… #AudHD #focus
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I’ve been co-work streaming three days a week and it helps me do things I wouldn’t normally be able to make myself do with any ease or enjoyment. This has been great.
But. I still have the same issues at times that I do when I’m not streaming where it goes like this:
I proceed to get myself ready to focus on some reading, writing, research, whatever. This might involve needing to do some small easy tasks or some fun reading or food or other comforts—whatever works. And that’s fine but it takes time.
Then once I’m in the groove my dog needs something (it’s usually this interruption, she’s old) or my mom is calling or something happens where I *have* to pause and attend to it. I pause. I attend. I’ve lost my focus.
Here, too, sometimes emotion comes in and so not only do I have to re-align myself to focus but first I have to calm down and let go of the negative feelings.
So ok then I’ve calmed down, I’ve realigned myself in some similar way to what I did prior to the interruption and I’m eventually again ready to focus.
But no. No. Now it’s time to eat and if I don’t say on top of my meals and space them out correctly I’ll end up feeling so shitty I can’t work at all so I pause again.
Then focus is gone again. The re-alignment is needed again.
So then once I’m done with all of this I might be lucky to get in an hour of focused work before I’m pulled out again. And focus at all isn’t possible on every single day, making it seem all the more precious when I have it and frustrating to keep dropping it.
