Happy New Year!

My favourite thing about Christmas morning is the look of joy on my husband's face when he sees what we bought the kids for the first time.

Is this still one of the best ever Wikipedia pages? Yes. Yes it is.

And the Angel Gabriel appeared before Mary and said, “Ooh, I like your robe!” and Mary did reply, “Thanks! It’s got pockets!"

If anyone is looking for a Christmas present for their nana, Iceland are selling huge sewing kits for a fiver.

Dads: Turn that bloody light off! It’s like Blackpool Illuminations in here. Do you think I’m made of money?

Dads at Christmas: I don’t think 96 strings of lights on the outside of the house is enough, love. Just popping to B&Q for another 47 and a 12ft illuminated reindeer.

A reminder that the BBC One ident for Christmas 1993 literally has to be seen to be believed.

You: I’m combining breakfast and lunch. Brunch.

Me: I’m combining wine and dinner. Winner.

I wonder if Chris Rea has started driving home yet.

Same.

Postman Pat - The horror version.

Clocks go back tonight.
I'm putting mine back to the time I didn't have wrinkles, hangovers didn't last for 3 days, and I could stand up without one of my joints making a cracking sound.
#ClocksGoBack

Me: Nearly Monday again. Totally ready for it.

Narrator: But she wasn't ready. She wasn’t ready at all.

Longest 10 minutes: Waiting for food to cook in a microwave.

Shortest 10 minutes: Between hitting the snooze button and your alarm going off again.

For my scary Halloween costume this year I’m going to dress up as a person who phones someone to respond to a text message.

My nemesis in cardigan wearing weather.

The best thing about Halloween approaching is being able to pass off the cobwebs in my house as spooky decorations.

September 30th vs October 1st

Found this review on Amazon a few years ago. It still makes me chuckle.

@jacquiharper @MikeHar94962844 Hedgehogs are intelligent creatures. Of course they can read.