I don’t know what the fuck The Materialists was trying to do but it did it badly. It felt like it was trying to have the bones of a romantic comedy but it just … I dunno. Felt weird.

I can’t escape this vibe that it wanted to pay homage to mumblecore but it’s nowhere NEAR the subgenre.

I know I’ve been quiet. I’ve been working hard on myself. My bestie came up from Atlanta and we went out last night. We talked a long time because she has PTSD and compared notes and coping strategies. We bounced between my favorite Asheville bars and ended the night at O’Henry’s catching the tail end of the drag show. It was a nice break from the internal hellstorm.

“Not the blade of grass psychoanalyzing you mid shroom trip!” is the greatest sentence I’ve ever uttered.

I don’t know if the SSRI is starting to hit after a week or if I’m slowly rebuilding my internal emotional compartments but I’ve settled into an odd pattern of extremely anxious mornings that flow into a mostly normal feelings afternoon and evening.

Now if I can just stop waking up at 3-4am.

Years and Years may not have been an appropriate selection for tonight’s binge watch but … here we are.

@biscuit_pup THAT’S SO GOOD! Nice elevation gain too!

I don’t like some of who I am post mugging but that bitch loves cardio with a passion and doesn’t get hungry without it. @.@ He gonna be a geriatric otter by next summer.

@arch Can I join the Doctor Who Nerd Spouse support group? lol. We watched last night. He’s still ranting.

@thickurt You look amazing tho! =^_^=

The amount of organized crime in used cars is pretty breathtaking.

“I am disappointed in the discourse about AI because some people yell at me that my shiny new toys have terrible externalities that I am happy to ignore” is certainly a take.

Shockingly simulating flight on a treadmill is a great way to deal with a fight or flight response that won’t go away. 🤣

@kevingranade I definitely cackled. 🤣 I’ve always been inspired by @aphyr ‘s days on Twitter and part of my personal activisim is just being my whole, gay self on main.

[*]: Understand that her name sounds even more hilarious with her very sweet grandma voice clashing against her Boston accent. It made me feel like I’m in an Adult Swim cartoon.

Apparently the technical term for all this is Acute Stress Disorder which is essentially “PTSD but the short term version EVERYONE gets after these sorts of traumatic events and then (mostly) recover from.”

I was laying there breathing deeply. Feeling my breath travel through my body, warming and relaxing it. Then there was…this…I dunno. Like I cleared a clog somewhere in the weight on my chest. I started crying. Just bawling. Through all of it.

I’m still weepy. But I was also horny and hungry today! So…we are headed somewhere.