In the good books. Just bought in a handful of radishes that I grew, nice variety, and J was thrilled and highly excited that we* have actually grown produce in our* own vegetable garden.

*I
*my
(I do not take the credit for her pottery just because we share a house, but that is apparently exactly how it works for gardens)

@hischeekiness It's such an incongruous place it's in as well, a hamlet just off the main road, then there it is at the end of a small residential road.
The family that run it used to have a small collie that was straining at the leash when you came out after a film... they'd let it go once everyone was out and it ran in to 'clean up' all the dropped popcorn. They lost it recently, so there's a small memorial in the foyer now and kids often drop a bit of popcorn in it.

Good morning. Today's 'unusual visitor to the bird feeder' list is a male pheasant.

Although not technically ON the feeder, just pecking at the seed overspill on the floor underneath it.

On another note, please can we have the earlier May weather back? This current stuff is too grey, wet and windy.

For no reason other than just to lift our spirits, here are some stupid jokes from Milton Jones:

“If you’re being chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire. They’re trained for that!”

“I used to think sticks and stones could break my bones but words could never hurt me – until I fell into a printing press.”

“As a child I had a medical condition that meant I had to eat soil three times a day in order to survive. Lucky my older brother told me about it really.”

“So I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.”

“Hard to tell if people are interested in joining my Sarcastic Club or not…”

“About a month before my grandfather died, we covered his back with lard. After that he went downhill very quickly.”

“My other grandfather was a peeping tom. He used to drill holes in the floor and spy on the people in the flat below. He died recently, but I like thinking about him up there somewhere, looking down on us.”

“I’m very English really. I even ordered a book on the internet: ‘How to Have Absolutely Nothing to Do with Your Neighbours’. Unfortunately, I was out when it was delivered.”

“When I was in America, I really got into the culture. I went into the shop and the guy said ‘Have a nice day’ and I didn’t. So I sued him.”

“I lived in a flat with three girls until they found out.”

“I don’t trust the press. Sometimes they wear badges that say ‘press’, but if you press those badges they just fall over all surprised.”

“Old ladies in wheelchairs with blankets over their legs? I don’t think so… retired mermaids.”

“I don’t know if you’ve ever fallen asleep whilst eating a plate of cauliflower, and then woken up, and thought you were in the clouds.”

“Years ago I used to supply Filofaxes for the mafia. I was involved in very organised crime.”

“To the man on crutches dressed in camouflage who stole my wallet: you can hide but you can’t run.”

“I’ve just finished my book, I wrote it on penguins. Come to think of it, paper would have been better.”

“Recently I’ve been attending meetings of Eavesdroppers Anonymous – not that they know!”

“You know the animal that kills the most people in the world? The Hepatitis Bee.”

“I was walking along the other day and on the pavement I saw a white baby ghost; however, come to think of it, it may have been a tissue.”

“I went out with this girl the other night, she wore this real slinky number. She looked great going down the stairs.”

“A lot of people like cats. Take the Pope, for example: I read recently that he was a cat-oholic!”

Good evening. J made me take her to the cinema - she loves the Mission Impossible films, so we had to go to see the last (or maybe just latest) one.

Utter bollocks of course, and too long, but you can't fault the bangs, bashing and bunkum.

The small independent cinema is in the middle of nowhere outside Bude, family run place. Much smaller place than your city multiplexes, with only two small screens, but better for it I think.

Good morning. Rapid unscheduled disassembly? It must be Wednesday.

@RolloTreadway I was totally clean shaven back in those days, but I have a goatee-type thing now. Mainly for laziness - two or three quick swipes with the razor on either cheek, no fiddly bits over lip, under chin etc to do, shaving done for another week!

I mentioned shaving in a reply to someone earlier, which bought this to mind.

I actually couldn't grow a beard as good as the chap in my profile pic. In truth, I only have to shave about once a week - if I leave it two weeks, not many would notice.

A fellow regular drinker in the local pub (in my 30's when regular drinking was *very* regular) started to tease me about how hairless in the facial department I was (and compared to him, arms, chest and back I shouldn't wonder) compared to "a real man like me."

In a rare case of timely wit (i.e. instantly at the time, not three days afterwards), I replied, "Yeah, that's because I'm more evolved from an ape than you are."

The expression on his face convinced me it would be a good time to nip up to the other pub in the village instead for the rest of the evening.

@sheepnik Yeah, J took the opportunity to 'clear out' some old stuff into rubbish and charity shop piles when she was doing the room, so I'm not 100% confident it's still in the house!

It felt odd to go back at first, but soon I thought about why it was necessary to use electricity for such a simple manual process (and the price of replacement heads....jeeez). Same with shaving (yes, I shave, despite profile pic suggesting otherwise).
So I've gone proper tree hugger and old school manual with both.

@sheepnik Ha, reminded me I haven't seen my toothbrush charger since J moved everything out of a room for the decorators to do. Have gone back to a manual because I HAD to eventually until we found the charger again (and we never have).

Not unhappy about this to be honest. Refuse to buy another electric with no doubt yet another charger. One less thing plugged into a socket is good.

Bedraggled.
Birdraggled.
Everything looking draggled this morning.

Having been relatively unplugged all evening, I've only just caught the news from Liverpool at the #LFC trophy parade. Shocking events to end a joyous day.

#YNWA

Ooh, this years Springwatch starts tonight. I hadn't seen any trailers so that is a pleasant surprise.

Actually, this may be a bit weakened as my 'tea' is rooibos, which isn't tea of course, but don't worry, I have some lapsang souchong if I need to get smoky.

I'm having a cup of tea, while perusing cupoftea social.

That's some powerful synergy right there - you should probably be very careful about upsetting me right at the moment because I can probably emit glowing lightning bolts of pure synergistic energy from my fingertips right now.

Had to cut my trainer bike ride short because I punctured.
This is stupid.

I'm expecting the valve area to have blown somewhere, but I'll look later. Shower and dog walk to be done first.
#cycling

Why has the weather suddenly got all cold and wet and grey?

Ahhh.. Bank Holiday Monday, of course.

What bad luck for those who yearn for and look forward to Bank Holiday Mondays.

Day of (relative) rest going well so far. Dog walk done, and it's a nice and quiet house for the afternoon as J is doing a shift volunteering at a ceramics gallery this afternoon.

One small frustration is that I have need of drilling a small hole in an outdoor table for a parasol to fit in, and despite efforts this morning I cannot find the set of drill hole cutter bits that I KNOW I possess. Garage, two sheds, utility room, all toolboxes found and searched, case with drill in... Where's Darth Vader with his light sabre? That would make the job so simple -zzzzummm, there you go Scribb.

Happy International Liverpool FC Lift The Premier League Trophy day to all who are fortunate enough to celebrate such things
🏆🎉🥳

#lfc #trophy #champions #premierleague #fedifc

This morning - all about fitness, with exercise routine, bike session, then walk with the dog.
This afternoon - essential recovery processes, i.e. plenty of tea, reading and snoozing.
Snoozing is an essential part of a fitness drive, I find.