Who Is Marisol Espinal? A Character Study in Not-Belonging
You won’t notice her at first. She blends in—on purpose. She’s the quiet one in the corner, hoodie up, shoulders tense, eyes always scanning. Not because she’s timid, but because she’s learned that watching is safer than being seen.
Marisol Espinal is not your typical heroine. She’s not trying to save the world. She’s just trying to survive herself.
There’s a kind of restlessness that simmers in her. The kind you get when the world keeps telling you who you’re not. Not Dominican enough. Not American enough. Not spiritual enough. Not normal enough. So she stays in the margins, trying not to be a problem, trying not to be noticed—until not being noticed starts to feel like disappearing.
But Marisol isn’t disappearing. She’s gathering. Gathering pieces of herself she was taught to be ashamed of. Gathering the questions that never had safe places to land. Gathering memories she thought were too painful or too strange to matter.
She doesn’t want to believe in magic. But it believes in her.
She doesn’t want to revisit the past. But it keeps calling her name.
What drives her isn’t courage in the traditional sense. It’s a quiet desperation. A longing to understand what made her—and what might unmake her if she doesn’t face it.
There’s a weight she carries that most won’t see. Grief she’s wrapped in sarcasm. Guilt she tucks under sharp comebacks. A hunger for belonging that she hides in rolled eyes and cold silences. But beneath all that? She wants to be whole.
She wants to feel like her skin fits. Like her mind isn’t a battleground. Like her ancestors are more than whispers in the walls.
And in so many ways, she’s a reflection of my own journey.
I’ve always felt fundamentally different—like I was never going to fit in no matter how hard I tried. I have a lazy eye, and from a young age that made me feel marked, like I stood apart from everyone else. Add to that a phenotype that refuses to conform—I’ve been told I look Italian, Persian, Portuguese… everything but Dominican. And when I say I’m Dominican, I get that look. The one that asks me to prove it. To explain myself. To perform my identity.
At first, I tried. I wanted so badly to fit the mold, to belong somewhere without being questioned. But as I grew and started embracing all the fragments of myself, I realized that I don’t owe anyone a performance. The only person I have to prove anything to is me.
That’s the journey I gave Marisol. It’s not loud. It doesn’t end in a clean resolution. But it’s real. It’s raw. It’s honest.
Marisol Espinal is the kind of character who doesn’t shout her arrival. She creeps in quietly, under your skin, until you’re thinking about her long after you’ve closed the book.
You won’t always agree with her. You might not always like her. But you’ll understand her.
And maybe, just maybe, you’ll see pieces of yourself reflected back.
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