Lmst

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say throw rotting fruit at your enemies.

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a cat with orange spots throws a watermelon slice through the air and thinks "resistance is fruitful."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say smoke weed and eat cookies.

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a cat with red eyes sits between a bong and a plate of cookies and thinks "wake and bake and bake and bake and..."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats love to see a crappy gray blob smeared over an electrical box or up a wall just as high as the buff man can reach. really enriches the environment compared to community created spontaneous art.

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a tuxedo cat sits and thinks "people who'd rather see ugly blobs of gray paint than graffiti have never had an original thought in their lives."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats never debase yourself for any reason other than that you feel like it.

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a cat wields a spraycan/lighter blowtorch and thinks "obedience is the lowliest form of self-debasement."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats smell like an angel... an angel's farts.

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a fluffy black and white cat sits and thinks "cats don't smell good, you have toxoplasmosis."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats the soup is free until it's in the little paper cup. the cat breath adds a little seasoning.

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a black cat with a little soup around its mouth sits and thinks "i drink from the ladle at the supermarket soup bar."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say i once saw a human doing this so enjoy the complimentary psychic damage.

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a scraggly striped cat, tongue hanging out, a scar over one eye (which is spiraled instead of a pupil) and a chunk of tail missing sits and thinks "i lick the handholds on the subway."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say the white house grounds should be made into the biggest collection of human-hazardous plants in the world and the people that work there should only be allowed to enter and leave on foot and nude.

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a two-face pattern ca with fangs sits and thinks "surround the white house with poison ivy."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say here it is, the dumbest comic i've yet done. thank you for reading my comics.

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a cat sticks out its tongue and sits and thinks "fart so hard you nut."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats drank all the beers too.

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a cat with black spots sits and thinks "i ate all the halloween candy already."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say isn't it weird that rich people pay fines and just get to keep doing the crimes? no suggestion that policy changes to prevent malfeasance. just pay the graft and continue on. business as usual.

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a cat with black ears and a black tail tip sits and thinks "for the poor, fines are punishment. for the rich, they are a cost of doing business."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats can't wait to have a beer later. we will have fun while drinking beer.

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a striped cat sits next to some beer cans, one crushed, and thinks "don't forget to put the 'fun' in 'functional alcoholism.'"

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say you're closer to being a starving, unhoused wretch than you are to financial solvency.

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a cat stretches and thinks "the meanest cat in the world cares more about you than the nicest politician does."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats remind you that all crimes depicted herein are not endorsed by the author, even the cool ones.

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a cat with bloodshot eyes sits and thinks "get baked first thing in the morning so that completing even small tasks feels triumphant."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats will never forget that video of teddy's wife and kid both lurching away from his affections during some stupid family photo op, the mix of disgust and horror on their faces identical and unquestionably genuine, like they were faced with a bucket of vomit and rattle snakes.

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a cat sits and thinks "i should get $500 every time i have to see ted cruz's disgusting face."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say you'll be made to choose eventually, or you'll just wither to nothing but a soft jelly only capable of consuming.

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a cat with black blotches stands and thinks "what rights will you lose before you riot?"

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say it's been this way a lot longer than you think.

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a cat with spots sits and thinks "if there's one nazi in your government and no one does anything, it's a nazi government."

good morning, enjoy a crime cat.

#TheCrimeCats say riot for the flotilla, riot for palestine, riot against the fascists who gaslight and manipulate and don't show up to work but still get paid. i fucking hate it here (earth).

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