Government Officially Approves Otoshidama as 'Pension Laundering': Grandchildren's Mobile Game Spending Now 'Tax-Free Public Works'
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Government Approves 'Pension Laundering' via Otoshidama
Grandparents' cash melts into mobile games instantly. "So this is trickle-down economics," says weeping grandpa.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260209-pension-console-cycle/
New iPhone Abolishes Charging Port, Introduces 'Official Spice Ejection Nozzle' — Device Locks If Non-Certified Salt Is Used
iPhone 17 'Spicy': Spice Nozzle Replaces Charging Port
Sprays curry via 'Spatial Flavor'. Non-Apple salt wipes data. EU furious, fans claim 'Apple salt has better resolution'.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260208-iphone-spice-wars/
Veteran Actor's 'Retirement Prank' Backfires Spectacularly — AI's Tears Outperform the Real Deal, Public Now Considering the Switch
Actor's Fake Retirement: AI Acted Better
An actor's AI retirement prank backfired when fans preferred the AI's emotional performance over his real acting skills.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260207-literacy-prank-backfire/
Exorcism Tax Hits 100%: Mandatory 'Poltergeist Power Generation' Turns Peaceful Homes into Energy Refugees
Poltergeist Power Mandate: Exorcism Tax Hits 100%
Govt classifies hauntings as energy. Peaceful homes taxed. People buy cursed objects to charge phones.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260206-poltergeist-energy-cm/
Comiket Doujinshi 'Tabloid Evasion Steps' Goes Viral as Practitioners Accidentally Reach Olympic-Level Athleticism
'Affair Evasion' Guide Creates Accidental Olympians
Comiket book on escaping tabloids turns cheaters into parkour pros. Ironically, their ripped bodies now stand out more!
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260205-infidelity-workout/
"Snow Shoveling" is Civil Engineering, "It's Cold" Posts are Weather Services — Government AI Suspends Millions of Pensions for "High Income"
AI Cuts Pensions: Snow Shoveling is "Work"
New Gov AI labels home snow removal "civil engineering" & cold tweets "reporting," cutting pensions for "undeclared income." Seniors rebel!
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260204-snow-pension-cut/
Controversy Over Installation of 'Power Switch' on Nara's Great Buddha
Stranded Climber Survives on 'Self-Multiplying Pie,' Gains 20kg — Rescuers Find Tent 'Completely Filled with Pies'
Climber Faces 'Infinite Pie' Nightmare
Biotech pie regenerates endlessly. Stranded climber gained 20kg battling the multiplying pastry filling his tent.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260203-infinite-planaria-pie/
Passwords Now "Passed Down Three Generations" for SDGs Compliance. Subject to Inheritance Tax
Passwords: The New Family Heirloom?
Reusable passwords for SDGs! Families pass down 'password123' for generations. Experts now call this vulnerability a "traditional craft."
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260202-eco-password-recycling/
National Tax Agency Classifies Dieting as 'Asset Concealment': Gym Users Face Mass Tax Evasion Raids
NTA Classifies Dieting as 'Asset Concealment'
New law declares body fat a strategic reserve. Weight loss is now tax evasion. Gyms raided as 'illegal depletion' sites.
https://alt.andpaper.net/en/articles/20260201-calorie-audit/
AI Mayor Renames Town to '【Free】High Income・Shady Jobs・Plastic Surgery', Logistics Network Completely Halted
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