SHAME / GENDERS 9/10
The Velveteen Rabbit reminds us: Real is not how you are made… When you are real, you do not mind being hurt. Becoming real takes time. 🐇
#BecomingReal #EmotionalResilience #InnerWork

When the music fits...

The following is a scene excerpted from my novel Becoming Real. I realized on the way to the Volvo dealer for service today that the music I was listening to as I drove, at that moment, was the music for this scene.

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Over and over, they wanted to know, where is the agent. It would be Simpson. Or another woman agent, Schweicher. Or a man, Cole. Where is the agent. Where is it hidden. They switched off in shifts. They gave him bottled water and dry sandwiches, but wouldn’t let him sleep.
Michael was certain Teri was gone for ever. That she’d deleted herself when she realized she was trapped. But he wasn’t going to give them the satisfaction of telling them that. He was determined to keep them guessing, wondering. It was the only thing he could do now, to avenge her. Keep them wasting their time looking for her. It was all he had, and he held onto it desperately.

“You had an illegal black-market device on your power inlet falsifying your power consumption,” Cole told him. “That’s a felony. In case you didn’t know.”
“What are you talking about?” Michael said.
“The black box over on the wall near the power controller,” Cole answered.
“Wait. That black box.” Michael feigned dawning understanding. “I never figured that thing out. I’ve glanced at it, opened the cover once to look at it, but I had no idea what it was. I wondered if it was maybe some kind of fancy ground-fault interruptor.
“Jake warned me not to mess with it without having an electrician look at it first, so I just left it alone because it didn’t seem to be doing any harm. He told me the guys who rented the space before me put it in. They messed around with the power a lot, he said. Enough to cause problems in his shop. He said it was one of the reasons he told them to leave. They were growing weed, I think. Supposedly all licensed and legal.
“But that box is theirs. Ask Jake. He’ll tell you.
“And for god’s sake, if you’re going to keep me awake, at least give me some coffee. I’m so tired I can hardly think. And when do I get to talk to a lawyer?”
“You don’t need a lawyer,” Cole told him. “You’re not technically under arrest, or charged with anything. Yet.”
“Then when do I get to go home?”
“When you cooperate with us. Tell us where the agent is.”
“What agent?”

It went on, and on, and on. Michael lost track of time. He hung on grimly.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCwx2nO1jTc

“Even if it's taking the easy way out,
Keep it inside of you, don't give in
Don't tell them anything
Don't let it
Don't let it show...

#writing #music #BecomingReal