“Don’t give a f#@&”
Note: This post was originally published in a slightly different form on Fritinancy, my Substack newsletter.
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“DON’T GIVE A F#@&” shouts the headline on a two-page ad in a recent Sunday New York Times. Instead of giving a f#@&, we’re instructed to “give an e.l.f.” — to substitute a three-initial brand name for a four-letter taboo word.
“DON’T GIVE a F#@&.” New York Times, November 2, 2025, page A9. Photo: Nancy Friedman.E.l.f. is a cosmetics brand — the initials stand for eyes, lips, face, and the name is pronounced as an acronym, elf — that calls itself “a different kind of beauty company.” (Where is the entrepreneur bold enough to launch “the same kind of beauty company”?) Founded in 2004 and based in Oakland, California (my hometown!), e.l.f sells its potions online, in U.S. retail chains such as Target, and in brick-and-mortar shops in 17 other countries. The company has partnered with singer-songwriter Alicia Keys on a sub-brand, Keys Soulcare, and recently made headlines for its $1 billion (!) acquisition of Rhode, Hailey Rhode Bieber’s line of “edited, efficacious, and intentional” skincare and makeup products.
How “different” is e.l.f.? Here’s the facing page of that ad:
New York Times, November 2, 2025, page A8. Photo: Nancy Friedman.Translation: Unlike our heartless competitors, e.l.f. cares (“gives a fuck/gives an e.l.f.”) about women in sports, fair trade certification, empowering legendary females (another e.l.f.!), et cetera. It gives so many e.l.f.s about “double-certified cruelty free” that it gives that virtue a double mention.
The campaign took its message to the streets of Manhattan last week, and Breaking and Entering Media was on the scene of the “activation,” to use the jargon-y term:
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The corporate website devotes a page — “Impact” — to more details:
GIVE A F#@&. GIVE AN e.l.f..
We give soooo many e.l.f.s — always have, always will.
From changing the board game to amplifying voices —
and donating 2% of annual profits to causes YOU care
about. It’s all in our 4th annual impact report.
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This isn’t the first time e.l.f. has flirted with naughty words. The corporate blog is called “The e.l.f. Word,” which winks at “the F-word.” The “page loading” graphic on the corporate website reads “Let’s Elfing Gooo.” (For more on “let’s fucking go,” see my January 2020 Strong Language post.)
And in 2024, the company launched “So Many Dicks,” a campaign that wasn’t exactly about penises. Its argument was the fact that men named Dick (or Richard, Rick, or Rich) outnumbered women of any name on the corporate boards of publicly traded companies. (Two-thirds of e.l.f’s board members are women.) “We want to normalize diversity — and if it takes some e.l.f.ing in-your-face advertising to do it, we’re happy to put it on some of the biggest screens you can imagine,” the company’s chief marketing officer, Kory Marchisotto, said at the time.
E.l.f. clearly likes to turn its brand name into various parts of speech, which is cheeky and a little risky. (Trademark lawyers will tell you it leads to genericide.) But I want to focus on something else about the current ad campaign, namely: Is it even possible, linguistically, to “give an e.l.f.”? Or a fuck? If it is, how many e.l.f.s (or fucks) can you give? And by the way: How long have we been giving (or not giving) fucks?
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I’ll take the last question first.
In the fourth edition of his indispensable The F-Word, Jesse Sheidlower traces the original DGAF abbreviation (“don’t give a fuck” = don’t care) to a 1995 Usenet posting. But DILLIGAF — “do I look like I give a fuck?” — is considerably older: Jesse found it in Current Slang, volume 5, number 1, from 1970: “‘D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.’ or DILLIGAF, n. An irresponsible person. . . . adj. Irresponsible.” The meaning has shifted over the decades to something closer to “indifference” or even “scorn”; The F-Word’s most recent citation, from 2020, concerns a New York City police officer who wore a face mask depicting the Punisher’s skull logo along with DILLIGAF.
As for the other questions, they’re catnip for the contributors (or co-fuckers, as we like to say) here at Strong Language. Linguistic anthropologist Stephen Chrisomalis, for example, tackled the issue of countable fucks back in 2014, under the heading “How many swears can we give?” Stephen’s jumping-off point was a then-popular meme, “Look at all the fucks I give”:
‘Give a damn’, ‘give a shit’, ‘give a fuck’, and other such items are all examples of negative polarity items (NPIs), which are unmarked when they occur in negative contexts. If you’re familiar with the phrase give a fuck, then you don’t need to be told that this is a rephrasing of I don’t give a fuck, because it rarely occurs as a positive polarity item (e.g. I give a fuck about you sounds odd).
(Emphasis added.)
Which would make “Don’t give a F#@&” and “Give an e.l.f.” sound slightly wrong to our ears. In advertising, though, that strangeness can be an asset: It creates just enough friction to be memorable.
Besides, as John Kelly observed less than a year after Stephen published his post, although “I give a fuck” is “not a way we would normally express care,” the expression is increasingly being used for humorous effect. Case in point: “I give zero fucks.” John wrote:
In 2015, giving zero fucks isn’t about not caring per se. Giving zero fucks is about an I’m-over-it ignoring of haters, trolls, and bullies, to draw on some popular vernacular; it’s about leaning in, #beingyourself, having swagger, no more ass-kissing or bullshit-taking. But this is a two-sided fuck, if you will. A zero-fucks approach can have a liberating assertiveness and self-confidence, but it also runs the risk of being heedless, uncompromising, irresponsible, or unfeeling, as Emma Gray smartly warned in her exhortation for us to give more fucks. This is an age-old tension for the individual in society, of course, but one that seems like it’s being more intensely staged in the modern psyche, on Twitter feeds, and American politics.
And in 2019, Ben Zimmer updated the discussion with “New Frontiers in the Giving of Fucks and Shits.” The post includes a spirited music video, “I’ve No More Fucks to Give,” which is the very best sort of earworm.
Probably not, though, for e.l.f., which is very much in the fucks-giving spirit this season. Ho ho ho!
#beingyourself #cosmetics #dgaf #dilligaf #eLF #lfg #mincedOaths
