2/ This inevitably led to another challenging conversation with C about our attitudes to group sex. She finds it really difficult to understand why I wouldn’t want another woman in bed with us. I explained again that it’s because I have an #anxiousattachment style and that I’d be terrified of her being more into the other woman than me - and that I’d ultimately lose her.
I also explained that her bringing it up again makes me think that she really wants and needs that sex life.
Understanding Attachment Theory: The Key to Healthier Relationships
#AttachmentTheory #Relationships #MentalHealth #SecureAttachment #AnxiousAttachment #AvoidantAttachment #EmotionalWellbeing #Connection #HumanPsychology #HealthyRelationships
Today is the first full day that my partner is fully off the grid
Our usual routine includes check-ins via text during the day, consisting of 🩷s, work rants or joy, & notifications about schedule changes etc
When one of us is traveling, we talk on the phone at least once a day
Im definitely noticing the habit shift. I’d already worked thru some #AnxiousAttachment stuff months ago, so emotionally I’m ok, I think (still processing lol), but I also “need” that conversation
Breaking the cycle of being attracted to avoidant attachment people. Learning to manage and be explicit with my needs as someone with #anxiousattachment . It's all about communication. If they can't give me what I need, then I can move on. But it is also my responsibility to communicate what I need. Broke a pattern today. :catJAM:
Me to my partner: You didn’t like my IG Story. Do you still love me?
Them: Yes! Of course.
Me: It’s okay if not, I just want to know.
// And that’s called Alcohol + #anxiousattachment style, folks 🤣
Still I persevere - while I work on myself, I try to surround myself with people who are direct in their feelings (mostly other ND folks) & don’t leave me wondering too much on where I stand with them - they don’t leave space for my brain to fill with negative thoughts & assumptions about future abandonment. My #anxiousattachment will take the rest of my life to heal, surely, but I am trying every day to remind myself that I am worthy of that healing & that my people don’t secretly hate me. 6/7
