I am 54 years old and have worked for some shit employers in my time. To give you some context to this statement: when my father passed away, I called in to inform them that I would be unable to honour my shift the next day. The colleague on the other end of the phone complained that I had not given them much notice. Being a huge fan of the works of ‘Zucker, Abrahams and Zucker’ I replied, “I would have called earlier, but my dad wasn’t dead then!” I was then criticised about my attitude by this dickhead, but to be fair, my line manager did call me back within five minutes to offer his condolences and ask how much time off I needed. Yesterday marks a first for me: at 22:25 on December 9th, I came a gnat’s chuff away from looking my line manager in the eye and screaming into his face that he could poke his job where the mice wouldn’t be able to get at it! It looks like 2026 will be the first year where the phrase ‘new year, new me’ could actually apply.





