#dailyprompt1911

I CHOSE ME

Daily writing prompt Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow. View all responses

Personally, I have felt like going crazy sometimes. Being a graduate with
big dreams but having nothing at age 30 does not feel like an achievement.
Worst, is still having to go back home to my parents because I lost
everything. In Nairobi this is failure. Having parents who blow hot and cold
in regards to circumstances does not help. When there is no money, of
course, you become a burden. What’s worse is having people around you
who believe that you enjoy staying in your parents’ home for the ‘free’ food
and accommodation. Free in quotes because, trust me it is not. The mental
drainage you get from constantly being put down by people who feel that
you lack ambition takes a tall. If you don’t take care of yourself, you’ll end
up mad.
Trust me, I have been there. It has taken me long to realize that in every
situation you can still hold on. Don’t let people tell you who you are. You
know yourself, just take in the negativity with a smile and make sure you
do not build it up in your system. Take a walk, cycle, dance, socialize and
shun away in more negativity, especially that which comes from people who claim to be your friends. Friends should offer support and solutions, not put
you down and create more problems. Don’t choose alcohol or any sort of
gratification to solve your problems. I’m not saying you stop drinking, just
make sure you do not relate your problems to any sort of instant gratification
because before you know it, you will have destroyed your closest ally, YOU!

Personally, it’s been hard for me when you put in factors like childhood
trauma and the lack of present success. It’s weird that people will only look
about issues using their own lenses. They really don’t care about you, but
how you being there affects their life. It’s taken me a while to know that
I’m my best chance of winning, so I have to take care of myself. Weirdly,
it’s that even though sometimes I have had the idea of what I needed to
do to succeed, I was always lagging. I always blamed what happened in my
childhood as well as other people. I’m alive now and the present moment
is that which matters. Even though I always come in my way and was the
biggest stumbling block, now I know better. As Kendrick Lamar says, “I choose
me, I’m sorry.”

Before having any friend, you
have to be your best friend,
before loving anyone, you have
to love yourself first. There is no
short cut to this. It always starts
with you and then spreads from
there.

#dailyprompt #dailyprompt1911

2025-02-09

The Wards In The Surgical Department | Sarawak General Hospital

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The main General Surgery wards in this hospital is located on the 7th floor of the main building which are Male Surgical Ward (MSW) and Female Surgical Ward (FSW).

I entered my General Surgery Posting during a time whereby there were no House Officers being allocated into sub-specialities. The only so-called “sub-specialities” that were available were “Vascular” and “Hepatobiliary Team – HPB”. Both of which are added under General Surgery.

Other teams such as Neurosurgery, Plastics, Urology and Paeds Surgery did not have House Officers. It wasn’t till towards the end of my service in this Posting that it was reintroduced.

Thus, our exposure towards the wards in General Surgery were limited but also made it pretty easy for us to manage.

1. Male Surgical Ward, MSW

Located on the 7th floor of the main building, it is considered the ward which is feared and avoided by many but is also where I’ve spent most of my time while being in this posting.

As the name suggests, it is mainly for male patients with underlying surgical issues or at least being managed by Surgical as the primary team.

This ward is usually avoided by many due to the overwhelming amount of patients which is twice the amount in Female Surgical Ward.

Twice the amount usually meant twice the amount of drama as well as the usual chaos.

My journey in General Surgery ended with my service in this particular ward.

2. Female Surgical Ward, FSW

This ward is also situated on the 7th floor of the main building and it is opposite the Male Surgical Ward, MSW.

As per its namesake, it mainly consists of female patients with underlying surgical issues or at least being managed by surgical team as the primary team.

Albeit it being a “Female” Surgical Ward, there would occasionally be male patients being treated there as the beds in the other wards are usually filled, causing an overflow of patients into this ward.

I started my tagging days in this particular ward and I would consider this ward relatively chiller and laid back compared to the other.

3. Vascular Ward

The Vascular Ward is located on Level 3 of the main building.

If you have done the Paediatrics Posting, it is situated in the same location as “Paeds Nursery Level 1″.

The ward is essentially divided into two, catering to both the Paediatrics Team as well as the Vascular Team.

4. Vascular Extension Ward

The Vascular Ward could only cater to at most, 10 patients. Thus, if there were any more patients to be managed under the Vascular Team, they would be placed in the Vascular Extension Ward or in the main surgical wards.

The Vascular Extension is located on the second floor of the main building, inside the Urology Ward which is situated opposite the emergency department, ETD.

During my service period in General Surgery, I have paid a few visits to the Vascular Ward and Vascular Extension Ward. However, I have never served my time there as I was not allocated to be the House Officer in the Vascular Team and also because it was a team I was avoiding.

Upon my exit from this posting, the sub-specialities were reintroduced again and House Officers were being allocated to other teams.

Thus, if you are due to experience the General Surgery Posting, I hope that you will find it as enjoyable as I did especially while working in the Male Surgical Ward.

It is indeed hectic and busy and going home on time is almost unheard of. Albeit MSW being an extremely busy ward, the medical officers I worked with as well as the specialists were kind, helpful and willing to teach.

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2025-02-03

My First Day Back At Work After A 6-Week-Break | Housemanship Diaries

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I officially returned to work on the 2nd of October 2024.

Initially, I was stationed to work the morning shift at ward. However, a colleague of mine decided to take a sick leave on that day when she was initially stationed as the House Officer in the Emergency Department, ETD HO.

Being the Allocation Leader in this department, it is my duty to immediately look for a replacement and to update in the group with the medical officers. Not one person came to mind and I felt bad since it was a friend of mine who took a sick leave or did I feel comfortable dragging another person to cover this shift since it is a shift most people avoided.

Thus, I offered to be the ETD HO myself. It was during an anaemic House Officer period and there were only one House Officer stationed at the Emergency Department.

Hence, I went to work and stocked up my necessary supplies before meeting the post night House Officer in the Emergency Department to receive my handover.

Of all days, it had to be one whereby no coming mornings (bloods) were taken for the patients and there were a lot of active job-lists not being carried out. Not to mention scans to be requested the following morning.

Basically, there were a ton of “shits” being thrown to me and if I do not settle it myself or to push my post night colleague to help me, I would be in a mess for the day.

Imagine having just returned to work to this. Without thinking much, I started identifying the patients who had bloods to be taken and proceeded to take all of them and sent it off. After sending them off, I started preparing for scans and called the radiology medical officer oncall to present my case.

Finally, after I thought I was done, I decided to review the stranded patients.

Normally, the stranded patients should be reviewed around 7am as we would begin our morning rounds around 7:30am till 8am. Thankfully, it was the weekend and rounds began much later.

I went through my list of stranded patients and there were almost 20. 20 stranded patients at various locations.

Would I have the time to review all of them? What about the active joblists or scans? Can I rely on my post night colleague? What if there is a new case?

I remembered it being a rainy day and the referrals were initially from wards and not from the Emergency Department (ETD).

Perhaps it would be a slow day. I thought to myself.

But, I thought too soon.

Soon, referrals started piling up. My medical officer’s phone (MO) was blowing up with calls. Other sub-specialities kept reaching out for me to help them out and at one point, me and my medical officer had to split to ensure we got everything done to the best that we could.

I wished that I could literally divide myself but I couldn’t. On top of that, my right foot started to ache. I just came back from a 6-week-break. I can’t afford to go on anther few weeks. If I do, just when am I going to end this posting?

I recalled it being a terribly hectic day and I felt bad as I was mostly away, having been dragged away by other sub-specialities, escorting patients or carrying out the active job-lists. I could not really be by my medical officer’s (MO) side to see the cases.

Finally, the end of my shift approached. 7pm and my night colleague came for handover.

Despite it being the evening already, the fire was still burning strong, referrals did not stop coming in and I still had tasks to complete or I would be handing over “shits” to my night colleague.

Finally, it was around 8-9pm, I can’t really remember as I was following night rounds with the OT call medical officer and registrar. My medical officer told me to return home since the following day, I would be morning shift.

I remembered returning home that day, somewhat unsatisfied with myself. No doubt that it was a tough day, but I could definitely do better. If only my leg did not slow me. The pain seems to increase with every step I took and with every exertion I made.

However, as I remembered, I was blessed to have an angel as my medical officer oncall for that day. Instead of shaming me or being sarcastic or mentioning that I could do better, she simply thanked me for putting my best effort on the first day back and welcomed me back.

It’s angels like this who makes me want to try to be better the following day.

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2024-09-24

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Daily writing prompt List your top 5 grocery store items. View all responses

Working as a House Officer, I do not go out to eat much. Mainly because our days are mainly occupied with work and after work, we would be drained. Well, most of the time.

Thus, if I were to really go out, it would be during my long breaks which is when I apply for leaves.

In terms of acquiring groceries, I rarely go to the grocery store myself as I do not have a car of my own in Sarawak. I am extremely dependent on Grab and overtime can be expensive as well.

Hence, I make do with the convenience store downstairs at my apartment which doesn’t really have much in terms of fresh foods or ordering online.

Here are my Top 5 must haves in my grocery list which is available in the convenience store if I were to just shop there.

1. Coffee

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As I mentioned in some of my previous articles before. It is a must have drug in my system. Personally I think I have grown rather immune to the effects of caffeine over the years from overconsumption. Thus, if I’m unable to get my grounded coffee beans, usually I’ll make do with some freeze dried coffee or a regular black coffee powder.

2. Oats

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I replace rice for rolled oats when I’m living alone. Back at home, my mother would always cook rice as my parents love rice. However, I noticed that I easily crash or get sleepy easily after consuming rice. Thus, I substitute it for rolled oats and usually I would cook soups or curries and pour the oats over it and consume it just like regular rice.

3. Eggs

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It is easily available. When there is nothing else stored in my pantry and everything else is closed, eggs go about well with almost everything. 

4. Noodles

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Well, I’m not exactly healthy per se all the time, and I do enjoy my occasional instant noodles. Especially after work and not having a meal the whole day, I’ll just whip up a quick dish of curry instant noodles with eggs.

5. Sausages

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Personally, I prefer chicken over sausages and as mentioned before, I rarely go out for my groceries. Hence, I’d go for sausage since it is easily available at the convenience store downstairs. In addition to that, I can be versatile with cooking them.

Thus, if I had to list 5 of the hat, these are my top 5 that I would shop for in any grocery stores amidst working as a House Officer.

Again, sadly, it lacks nutrition. But, oh well.

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2024-09-22

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I tagged for almost a month here.

The tagging timing in the Surgical Posting is from 7am till 10pm which is same as with other postings, except Obstetrics & Gynaecology (O&G).

In the Surgical Posting, we all have to complete a compulsory 14-Day-Tagging period irregardless of having “off-tagged”. Entering the Surgical Department as a senior or fourth poster, we are allocated to special shifts such as night shifts in ward or night shifts in ethe emergency department (ETD).

This serves as an advantage to us seniors as we do not have to work the morning shift for one week straight prior to having an off day. It is also better as it allows us to recuperate in between by not having to go to work extremely early.

However, the disadvantage is that our tagging period is somewhat extended.

As I mentioned before, we are required to complete a 14-Day-Tagging period. The night shift is not counted. Hence, the tagging duration can go up to 3 weeks.

For me, it extended up to 4 weeks due to my medical leaves (MC).

During my first week of tagging, I took a day of medical leave due to extreme fatigue and in the second week, I took 3 days of medical leaves due to extreme fatigue and COVID-19.

At the time of writing this article, I am on a 6 weeks medical leave due to my ATFL injury.

Sometimes I wonder, if I will ever exit this posting and proceed with my last which is medical.

Back to the tagging part, thus my tagging period lasted for a month.

Going to work as a tagger, I would leave home around 5:45am – 6am. Partly because I’m just tired and felt like I needed more rest because there will always be an active issue in ward and I am only able to return home at 10pm.

In the evening around 7pm, I would go for dinner after handing over to the night colleagues and completing my tasks and on-call reviews for the day. Most of the time, it would be our first meal of the day.

Some days, we would be done by 8-9pm and on some days, earlier. Most of us, upon completing, would head for dinner and head home or to just head home straightaway.

This is wrong of course but we were simply exhausted and burnt-out during the tagging period. Thus, we grab the opportunity while we could.

Towards the end of my tagging period, I started bringing packed dinner boxes and reheating them as work prior going back.

Surviving the tagging period in the Surgical Posting was hard and tiring but eventually, it did came to an end.

Thus, if you have yet to enter the Surgical Posting, the tagging period is indeed tiring as with any posting. However, try to learn as much as you can and take comfort in the fact that it does come to an end.

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2024-09-17

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“You Guys Are Angels”

This may be a biased statement and it differs according to the individual’s experience. Thus, although I do know of the controversies I may ignite. I am merely saying this out of my own firsthand experiences and as mentioned before, each person’s experience differs greatly.

MOs, short for Medical Officers.

First of all, I don’t know how do you guys (medical officers) do it, pulling through an oncall shift, just to return for another oncall duty the following day after postcall. Perhaps it is because during my current batch, we have shifted fully to the “shift system”. Thus, we have yet to experience the “oncall” system which was experienced by the older house officer batches. 

I am in awe and I appreciate the determination and discipline that goes with it. Most of the time when an oncall medical officer is on duty, they solely handle the referrals from emergency or ward and sometimes both. This goes on from the start of that day till the following morning and after which they would have to help out in clinics during their postcall, wards or even in operating theatres (OT).

Most of the time, they are alone unless they are lucky enough to have a “tagger”. Thus it is them, the house officer, the registrar and the specialist that forms the oncall team.

That is if they are oncall. In the wards, they rely on the house officers to carry out the active joblists, to take the bloods, request necessary scans, to resuscitate the patient first and inform if there are any acute issues and to carry out the morning, evening and oncall reviews while they are in the clinics or operating theatres or helping out in other places.

I used to think that once we have completed housemanship, life will be better. However, after observing my medical officers and registrars, it does not actually get better, the stress is on another level, the responsibilities increases yet they pull through it with jokes and smiles. I used to think that, perhaps they have gotten used to it. On the other hand, I’m still struggling

Medical Officers are in charge of the House Officers as well. Thus, if any pitfalls were to occur, of course we do get scolded but they are the ones who get reprimanded as well. I’ve lost count of the times when the medical officers have backed me up. Although I do know that, that is their duty but albeit the responsibilities and the stress, I’ve experienced it first hand multiple times when they would take the fall instead when it comes to answering the specialists.

There are times when I do feel their anger were uncalled for. However, most of the time I understand that it mainly stems from tiredness. The patience really wears thin and snaps easily when there is lack of proper rest

A lot is expected of them from the specialists and on top of that, taking care of us, House Officers too and teaching us what we do not know while trusting the patient’s care into our hands while they are off to help out in a different place. They are always a call away even if we are placed in the night shift. Thus, should there be any issues, they are always nearby and there.

Yet, after work, after the tiring day and issues that occur in ward, they return home to their families and loved ones and try to go about their life, only to return and repeat it again the following day.

Some might say, well, it is their duty isn’t it? I’ve heard it before.

It is true and personally I feel that we as House Officers, although we are tired, and on top of that being tested emotionally, they are even more tired. 

Thus, if there is anything at all that stems from this article, it is my deep and heartfelt gratitude and appreciation towards the Medical Officers, which are rarely said.

My dear readers, if you are beginning your journey as a House Officer or is currently going through your housemanship or internship journey, have faith, patience and to always remember to be kind. Remember that as House Officers, we serve to ease the burdens of the Medical Officers on top of learning on the job, for we will one day take their place. 

A fellow colleague always mentions this sentence while I’m in my Surgical Posting, “Don’t do unto others what you don’t want them to do unto you”.

This wise line by Confucius has a special place in my heart and I hope it does for you as well. As you become more senior and familiar with the work at hand as well as build good relationships with your superiors, always remember to be humble and kind.

Do not let cockiness overcome you nor be easily angered when a fellow junior makes a mistake or asks for guidance. 

We were all once in their shoes as well.

Always remember to take care of yourselves first, so you can serve others best.

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2024-04-17
Daily writing prompt Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow. View all responses

You want one? How about I give you two? Maybe even two and a half? I’m crazy like that. Also, the stuff that I give you today also happen to be things that I’ve written about in daily prompts very recently so… yeah. Repetition is good for growth and shit. I don’t know, whatever.

First, we travel back in time to the 20th century. The early 1990’s saw a certain tall red head dropping out of college. A dumb ass move, for sure, but at the time it was the only move that made sense to me. A job followed, then a year in a tech school, followed by a failure to get a job in that field, followed by a crap job in a warehouse. That’s when we get to the point of the decision that helped me learn and grow. I was making like $8.00/hour working in a retail chain’s warehouse as the guy in charge of customer returns and I just got fed up and decided to give college another try. This time I wouldn’t be a music major, this time I would take classes that might actually lead to a job someday. Going back to school was the big decision, but a secondary decision was to rig my classes so that I started from as close to the lowest level math subject that my new school would allow me to take. My primary hang up the first time through college was my shitty math skills, and the second time around I was going to major in a study that leaned heavily on math. I put myself into the lowest level course I could and basically started from scratch. It totally paid off. By the time I was through the mathematical pipeline I was acing high level courses and it felt great.

The second growth worthy decision happened on May 20, 2008. Jen and I were in the little postage stamp sized back yard at the duplex we were renting, cooking dinner on our gas grill. I reached a point where I just couldn’t stand waiting anymore and I got down on one knee and asked her to marry me. She said yes. Best. Decision. Ever. That lead to me learning how to be a husband, learning how to be a better human, learning how to be an adult, learning how to be a step father, learning how to be really happy, and basically learning how to be me at my best. Like I said, best decision ever.

The extra bonus decision is the choice to pursue weight loss surgery. I don’t know how much actual learning and growing have come from it. That’s probably a question for future Rob to ponder. It’s been two years (almost) but I will need more time to pass before I can pin down exactly what the differences are, apart from the number on the scale of course. That and the sizes on my clothes.

So there you go, folks. Two plus answers to the question of the day. No surprises here. Hope you all have a good Wednesday, unless you are reading this at some point in the future, in which case here’s hoping you’re having a good whatever weekday it happens to be on your timeline. Good day.

https://robertjames1971.blog/2024/04/17/growth-2/

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2024-04-11
Daily writing prompt Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow. View all responses

Giving up on caring about every little thing. Choosing to be joyful through the storm. I wrote this article in response to this because for me it wasn’t a single decision, but a LIFESTYLE shift.

That being said… this is a pretty revealing dive into the interconnectedness of emotional and physical health, with studies highlighting how our emotional states significantly impact our overall well-being, and even live longer.

The Shield of Positive Emotions

Research underscores the profound effect emotions have on our health. Emotions like joy and gratitude don’t just make us feel good—they actively contribute to our physical well-being.

These positive states trigger the release of endorphins, akin to those produced during physical activity, which act as natural painkillers and mood elevators.

This biological response to positive emotions supports not only immediate well-being but also fortifies our health against future illnesses.

The Role of Emotional Well-being in Physical Health

Delving into the specifics, emotional well-being emerges as a critical pillar of physical health.

The stress of daily life can manifest in various physical symptoms, from headaches to exacerbated conditions like hypertension. Conversely, managing stress and fostering positive emotions can protect against these physical manifestations.

By acting as a buffer against stress and its physical repercussions, emotional intelligence plays a pivotal role in maintaining cardiovascular health and preventing chronic conditions.

Beyond the Placebo: The Real Impact of Emotions on Health

The connection between the mind and body is a fundamental aspect of overall health and well-being that has been extensively studied and recognized in the field of medicine. While the placebo effect is certainly a part of this connection, there is much more to it than just the power of suggestion. The mind-body connection is a complex interplay of physiological, psychological, and emotional factors that influence our health in profound ways.

Research has shown that our thoughts, emotions, and beliefs can directly impact our physical health. For example, chronic stress and negative emotions can weaken the immune system, making us more susceptible to illness.

The exact opposite is the case for positive attitudes and emotional states. These factors are commonly associated with better immune function and a reduced incidence of diseases, illustrating the tangible benefits of happiness and relaxation on our physical state.

Incorporating mind-body techniques such as meditation, yoga, and cognitive-behavioral therapy into healthcare practices has become increasingly common as healthcare providers recognize the significance of this connection.

By taking this holistic approach, healthcare professionals can help patients achieve not only physical healing but also emotional and psychological well-being.

Gratitude, Love, and the Heart

Dive a little bit deeper, and you’ll find that the physiological effects of specific emotions like gratitude and passion reveal their power to enhance health.

Gratitude, for instance, not only lowers blood pressure and speeds healing but also promotes a more harmonious electric activity around the heart and brain.

This state of harmony enhances the effectiveness of these vital organs, spotlighting the heart’s responsiveness to our emotional states.

In essence, the journey to health is as much about managing our emotions as it is about physical exercise and diet. Recognizing and nurturing our emotional well-being can lead to a life not just lived longer, but also richer in quality and satisfaction.

Resources

The Link Between Emotions and Health

The Mind-Body Connection: How Emotional Wellbeing Affects Your Physical Health

https://froydinger.com/emotions-unlocked-eq-hack-to-a-healthier-longer-life/

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