when i was a kid, and i was supposed to be "a boy", i remember having this feeling that every time i started getting close to a girl, every time i started feeling things for a girl, i thought i was in love with her. well turns out i'm a girl and turns out i'm on the aromantic spectrum.
looking back, it's really obvious that i wasn't in love or anything. i was just getting close to someone. we were becoming close friends. but it wasn't working well because i was supposedly a boy and they were girls. and for some reason, this changed things a lot. it was the same thing that prevented me from getting too close to other boys.
heteronormativity and cisnormativity got in the way of healthy, fun, non romantic relationships. because while no one was comfortable with me exploring my gender identity or my sexual identity, this was supposedly normal. but in truth, it was learned. forceably so.
there is nothing natural in not being able to befriend with someone of the "opposite sex". because you're made to feel like "it's supposed to mean something else".
we are not okay with children hearing about people attracted to the same gender as them or transgender people, but we're okay with them believing that men and women can't be friends, separating half of the populations into believing that they're almost different species. and i mean, saying it like that makes it sound like these are two wildly contradictory things, but no. it's the point. both of these beliefs complement one another.
it's almost as if it was... a system... making sure that this gender divide is something that cannot be changed or crossed... to keep men on top while still making sure they're isolated and miserable, and to keep women inferior while being dependent on men... some kind of... patriarchy... :neofox_thinking:
#heteronormativity #aromantic #trans #transgender #feminism
