#programmingjokes

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-12-07

Ah yes, yet another attempt to decrypt the Rosetta Stone of - "literate programming." πŸ“šπŸ’» A literary masterpiece where everyone pretends to understand , while secretly just hoping the comments make the code run faster. πŸ€¦β€β™‚οΈ Spoiler alert: It’s like Shakespearean sonnets but for the terminally nerdy.
pqnelson.github.io/2024/05/29/

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-12-02

πŸ§πŸ€¦β€β™‚οΈ Behold, the most riveting mystery of our time: a URL in C that compiles! Apparently, https:// is just a cunningly disguised label. Who knew?! πŸ† Clearly, this revelation changes everything we knew about programming. πŸ˜‚
susam.net/url-in-c.html

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-11-06

πŸπŸ€” Oh no, allocates integers on the heap! Quick, someone alert the media! πŸ“’ As if the Python team hasn't been dealing with this trivial "discovery" since the dawn of time. Maybe next week we'll get to the bottom of why water is wet. πŸ’§
zackoverflow.dev/writing/how-o

cloud β€” GayDPR Compliantcloud@polymaths.social
2025-10-27

"yeah, my android app is 50% java, 50% kotlin, i know both languages very well."

Yeah, well i brought you a rope, please die.

#shitpost #programmingjokes #programming #java

2025-10-06

:drake_dislike: Provably correct software
:drake_like: Proverbially correct software

#ProgrammingJokes #ProgrammingHumor

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-08-28

Ah, yes, because clearly everyone needs their very own Command Line Interface Übermensch to navigate the mind-boggling complexity of... writing basic scripts. πŸ™„ Why buy a tool when you can spend eons building a half-baked one with more acronyms than usefulness? πŸ› οΈπŸ’‘
martinfowler.com/articles/buil

Vivia πŸ¦†πŸ΅:rustacean_ferris:vivia@toot.cat
2025-08-06

Me, telling my brother about a hard day: "and I was facing a hard problem with my code at work, and I also had to take care of that leak I had failed to fix in --"
Him, thinking: "(surely that must be C code)"
Me: "-- the bathroom sink"

#ProgrammingHumor #ProgrammingJokes

Two memory locations talk. One says:
- Just so that we are on the same page…

#programmingjokes

2025-06-27

A la la la la int64,
A la la la la int64 int64 li int64 int64 int64,
Come on!

#programming #programminghumor #programmingjokes #swdev

Rust Bytesrustaceans
2025-06-22

Rex Wang rewrote Kafka in Rust, creating StoneMQ - a blazing-fast, efficient message queue.

wangjunfei.com/2025/06/18/Rewr

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-05-29

πŸ–₯️ Ah yes, because what the world really needed was yet another 'simple' programming language that promises to turn your browser into a coding paradise. 🌐 It's like someone thought, "How can we make coding even more like a PowerPoint presentation?" βŒπŸš€
tiki.li/apps/tut_learn.html?v=

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-05-25

Why would anyone need a whole framework to pass a value into a constructor? πŸ€” It's like hiring a team of architects to help you open a door. πŸšͺ Let’s face it, the real 'dependency injection' here is injecting into tech discussions. πŸ˜‚
rednafi.com/go/di_frameworks_b

Assn for Computing MachineryACM@mastodon.acm.org
2025-05-23

It's been a long journey...

#codinglife #fridayvibes #programmingjokes

N-gated Hacker Newsngate
2025-04-15

πŸ€“ Ah, yes, because everyone has been clamoring to handcraft their own one-time password algorithms instead of using the perfectly good ones that already exist. πŸ”§ Clearly, the pinnacle of tech wizardry is reinventing wheels that came pre-invented. πŸ›ž
blog.dogac.dev/how-do-one-time -timepasswords

TechGeeksApparelTechGeeksApparel
2025-03-29

2B Or Not 2B? πŸ€”
Boolean logic meets Shakespeare.
if (2b || !2b) return "That is the question."

πŸ”— techgeeksapparel.com/2b-or-not

2025-03-09

Being a dev means trying to explain something to a non-dev...
...
..
.
and halfway through, realizing you don’t fully understand it either.

#ProgrammingJokes #DevJokes #CodingJokes

2025-03-07

How do you spot a hipster programmer?
...
..
.
They were using Rust before it was cool.

#ProgrammingJokes #ProgrammerHumor #DevHumor

Client Info

Server: https://mastodon.social
Version: 2025.07
Repository: https://github.com/cyevgeniy/lmst