Blame, shame, guilt, and victimization allow you to defend the pain in one way or another.
When projected at others, they make it so that you don't have to deal with your own pain because they place it at the feet of other people.
When we talk about self-awareness, part of the deal is getting okay with the pain that you feel and not making it anybody else's responsibility. If you're not willing to pay attention to your own pain then there is a huge chunk of yourself you're not paying attention to. You can't be fully self-aware without acknowledging all the bits, including the pain.
Youch! This one hurts, doesn't it? Those defenses are strong and hard to let go of.
Sometimes I talk about this in terms of acceptance, which works. But what if I just told you to let your guard down a bit? Stop defending yourself against yourself.
When the pain isn't happening anymore and you're still doing this, you're defending you against you. It's your pain you're defending yourself against.
The past isn't going to come back to bite you. It's not happening now. There's nothing there to be bothered by except your fear that there is something there.
When you deal with pain, you don't have to relive whatever it was that happened. You don't have to jump back in and tell the story of it anymore. The fear of needing to relive it as a form of dealing with it, keeps you from dealing with it.
You don't have to relive it to acknowledge it and allow it to be there.
If you were to come upon your old baby clothes, would you try them on? Would you relive being a baby? Of course not. Why do you do this with your experience when it's painful?
If you can let the clothes just be there and not wear them, then you can acknowledge the pain and not relive it.
I can help you work through this if you're ready.
Message me for info on all the cool stuff I've got happening.
Love to all.
Della
#spirituality #healing #pain #letitgo #blame #shame #guilt #victimization #awareness #selfawareness #consciousness